Ok, after being in heaven for a couple of days (because I have listened to all songs that the band bellow has ever recorded) I have decided to once again spread my love to my web site.  Poker seems to be what annoys me right now. I am one of those people who can’t really play any card games which, to tell you the truth, astonishes many people.

- Wow, you can’t play (insert popular card game here)??? What kind of freak are you?

Not a freak, mind you, just someone who doesn’t feel the need to sit in one place and play with luck for three hours.

- But, it is so much more than that!

Yes, that’s what they all will say. They will say that it is about skill, bluffing, reading facial expressions, adrenaline, etc. However, any game that encourages wearing a hat and sunglasses indoors is not really worth it in my opinion. Just watching those dwarfs play their little tournaments rips my heart apart — hours and hours of sitting down, playing with their chips and hoping to get a good hand.

I was watching a poker game for a while one day, and I was really wondering what those people were thinking while they were playing. Some of them were stretching expansively, others were close to falling asleep. What goes through their minds during that time? Surely, their brains couldn’t be occupied with plastic cards and chips for such a long time. Maybe something like “Oh, I wonder why Obama changed his stand on the FISA bill?” or even something in the lines of “I wish the Backstreet Boys would make another CD” — I just want some kind of thought from these guys. By the way,  how do they reminisce over their games?

- Hey, do you remember that hand I once had? - generic poker player 1

- You mean the aces and the kings? - generic poker player 2

- That’s exactly what I mean, man! - generic poker player 1

- Cool! Those were some good times! - generic poker player 2

Am I forgetting something? Oh yeah, people play for money. I wouldn’t hate this game if money was not involved in it. Believe it or not, most people won’t play poker unless it is with real money. I know right? There are always going to be a selected few who “made a fortune” out of poker, but  for most it is a cycle of losing and gaining. Some are even addicted to this crap. It is such a terrible waste to use the perseverance of the human spirit on something so limited and pointless. Betting on a cock fight is more exciting than losing your money in poker. Then again, I am sure that there are people who are addicted to cock fights. I wonder how I know…

Anyways, it seems that the only climax in poker is when somebody goes “all in,” but what about the rest of the time? It’s a terrible thing to watch and play. Amusing, but still terrible. No matter how many movies they make about poker and its coolness, I will never buy into it because I am a man of principles (well besides the cock fighting, but that’s just something I do).

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